With a topic as sensitive as abortion, I feel that it is important to get the story from many points of view. It is important when making life-changing decisions to know what the effects could potentially be. Mystiqua’s account of her struggle with domestic violence and the abortion that followed is a real-life account that everyone should read.
[quote]”That is not how it works, there are tons of mental and emotional stress that are involved. I went through highs and lows, not knowing if I would be forgiven for such a sin so gruesome. I suffered through a lot of pain, hurt, envy, anger, and distress from it. Not to mention the emotional rollercoaster of dealing with a “fiancé” that was abusive to me sexually, mental, and physically. My triumph only came really, after I met my present husband… and I realized that I was indeed forgiven by my Heavenly Father. I was washed clean through the blood of the Messiah. He prayed with me, studied the Word and helped me to see that not only was I forgiven but I needed to forgive myself. Once I did that and allowed myself that freedom, I was able to move on. Now I try to share my testimony with women that have been through this same thing. Abortion is not a simple remedy…it is something that can haunt you for a very long time. If you let it and not become redeemed by the blood of the Lamb…can haunt you for the rest of your life. It is time to stop running from the issue but talk about it and help these women to see that there is a lot more to it. A lot more than a person can “mentally” handle.” [/quote]
About the Contributor:
The Mommy LifeStyle Logo
Mystiqua is the wife and help-meet to her amazing husband Andre’. She is the mother of their 6 beautiful children, each one adding daily to her joy. Mystiqua is the founder of The Mommy Lifestyle http://themommylifestyle.com which is a blog dedicated to homeschooling (especially in the African American community) and encouraging and building women in their roles as godly wives, mothers, and keepers of the home. All while keeping their own personal feminine style and beauty.
Having endured bitter storms and fiery trials including domestic violence and abuse, Mystiqua is a living testimony of the fulfillment of Yahuah (God’s) promises of beauty for ashes. Having been made free from a life that held her bound, she has a heart for hurting women and her passion is seeing them made whole by the hem of His garment and the power of His love, she knows there is victory on the other side.
So, how can Post-Partum Compression wear help you?
It is said that a woman must allow herself the same duration that she was pregnant to lose the pregnancy weight. Four months into motherhood, and losing the baby weight was a breeze. For some new mothers, however – getting rid of the pooch proves to be a longer lasting task.
**Note: I’ve included some affiliate links to help with your shopping experience. You’re welcome! **
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Most (if not all) Caribbean and Latina women know about “faja’s;” they are the shape-wear that many women wear under clothing to smooth the silhouette. After childbirth, many mothers of the new mom will assist her in obtaining shapewear and help to put them on during the daily routine. The faster shape-wear is worn, the faster the healing process can begin.
The easiest form of faja is the unitard. It holds you in everywhere. Now, if you have a large stomach it won’t be hidden – but it does smooth out the appearance. This is also beneficial after a c-section as it helps to hold your tender organs in place. The panty-like closure is more comfortable for c-section moms because the pressure is displaced evenly. Mesh unitards can be worn in the shower if necessary, and dried off while getting dressed. I’ll talk about waist shapers at another time.
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Compression helps curb hunger by minimizing the space a stomach has to expand, as well as flatten the stomach while the uterus and other organs shift back into place. It is often a lifesaver when getting in and out of bed, because all of the organs are held firmly in place. It saved my life during the first few weeks home with baby.
The best part is, it’s undetectable under your clothes. The healing process is your business alone. No one needs to comment on your methods or judge you for them. Check out my pictures and you’ll understand.
I hope to start more rigorous ab work this week, but my incision is still healing so I have to be careful. I am in no rush, as my husband and I are enjoying the new hips and butt I have gained through pregnancy. It offsets the stomach 🙂
Feel free to contact me for more questions about compression shapewear for postpartum recovery. I’m always available at vforvadge@gmail.com, or in the contact box below. Talk to you soon!
The Weight of a Feather is a series of random short stories, depicting life’s journeys. Each story “ends” cleverly (or doesn’t end at all), leaving more for the imagination to wonder about. Of course, until the next story snatches your attention.
From trials to triumphs and vice versa, these stories are a warm embrace for anyone who has experienced love, loss and life in general. It begins with the title story, that in reality is a story that many older individuals may relate to. A young girl spends months befriending a “pet” chicken that roams freely on her family property – only to have it make the ultimate sacrifice by ending up on her dining table. My mother once shared the exact life occurrence when she was the same age as the main character. To this day, she is unable to enjoy pets, as she recognizes as an adult that life can be fleeting and unexpectedly disappointing.
One story that was especially poignant to me was “The Negotiation,” where a widowed husband finds a clever way to make sure that his late, dear wife’s car never gets sold. This story struck a special chord, as I recently lost my grandmother in 2013. Mementos are especially important to keep our loved ones’ memories alive. I was left wondering what would come of the old man, and used my imagination to creatively shape his destiny.
The paradigms shift from tale to tale – a mother mourns the lost life of her son by putting herself in a brief exile in “Born Beneath a Balsamic Moon.” She finds very little healing in the pain she mentally inflicts upon herself, but feels it is the only way to feel connected to his soul. A chance encounter with who seems to be a random homeless man creates the epiphany she needs to start life anew. There was beauty in this story; like a phoenix the mother was able to rise from the literal ashes.
Irony plays a major part in “Rainbow Farm (or the Ghost of Christmas Past), as Affirmative Action leads society to a reindeer Santa. I had to chuckle while reading this story, and wonder what inspired it. What life experiences could the author have had to hint at the subtle tragedy of discrimination through such blatant humor.
I will pass this book on to each of my friends who request a good read. As we travel through life, it is crucial to remember the great gifts that we are given. Life itself is a gift that many of us take for granted each day. The Weight of a Feather is a light book, but holds a place in my heart forever.
About the Author (By the Author):
I talk too much. I get overexcited when something catches my interest. I’m vegetarian because how can I eat animals? I may as well eat my cat! When time allows, I escape to the bush or the mountains to restore a sense of calm and timeless rhythm to my life.
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With the beat of Africa in my blood, my poetry and my novels are set in this continent, which has deep passion as its heart. The driving motivation of my characters is the search for love in all its forms.
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I write because I believe that words have great power: they can bring comfort, joy and hope. They can reveal secrets and lies. And, while they may not change the world, they can – at their best – change people’s lives, even if only for a moment.
Although I now live in Johannesburg, the economic powerhouse of Africa, my childhood was played out in the Zimbabwean bush. Born in a little village called Zvishavane, I’ve spent most of my life in South Africa. My diverse career path has had me working as a waitress in a steakhouse; as a bartender in an English pub (to earn money to pay for a hot air balloon ride for my Mom and myself!); and as an accountant, which was my career for many years.
Fascinated by evolutionary astrology, I resigned as Chief Financial Officer for an internationally linked accountancy firm when I married one of their partners, and spent the next decade dabbling in writing novels, while studying and practising evolutionary astrology. I loved helping people through crisis times in their lives but, eventually, I was so drained from all the emotional counselling, I decided it was time to follow my own destiny and concentrate on my dream of writing fiction. So…here I am!
Shadow taking charge.
I’m married to Beric Croome and have one furchild, a black cat called Shadow who adopted me in August 2012.
As a fellow vagina owner, I know the importance of being familiar with oneself. Self Love is so important, and I’d like to start by talking about the basics of Vadge care. After all, no one will take better care of it than you will – and that’s the way it should be. Take a look at these facts about your vagina, and get some bonus tips to keep your Hoo Hoo healthy in this winter chill…
With all the things we have to think about on a daily basis the last thing we want to worry about is what is happening down there. Here are some tips to help keep your hoohoo healthy.
It benefits from exercise. Just like you do sit-ups to workout your abs, it’s beneficial to workout the muscles in your vagina. Besides giving you a tighter grip during sex, it also may make it easier to climax. Here’s how you exercise your vagina: Clamp down as if you’re stopping your urine flow, hold for 10 seconds, then release. Do 3 sets of 15 a day.
2. It’s just one part of your down-there region. Most of us use the word vagina to refer to our private parts. But technically, the term describes only the narrow canal that runs inside your body from the vulva (the visible area that includes the inner and outer labia, clitoris, and perineum) to the cervix (the lower portion of the uterus).
If you smell something “off”, it might mean that you are off balance or you have an infection. Over cleansing your hoohoo removes all the goodness Mother Nature put down there and added fragrance simply provides another molecule for bacteria to grow on. Use a product that is fragrance free like and see your doctor if a funky odor persists.
3. Cleansers with fragrances might make it smell worse. If you smell something “off”, it might mean that you are off balance or you have an infection. Over cleansing your hoohoo removes all the goodness Mother Nature put down there and added fragrance simply provides another molecule for bacteria to grow on. Use a product that is fragrance free like healthy hoohoo and see your doctor if a funky odor persists.
4. Wear cotton underwear. Synthetic fabrics can cause irritation to your vagina. Cotton is a much friendlier fabric for your nether regions and let’s “her” breathe.
5. Don’t clean hoohoo with soap. Using soap, no matter how mild and natural, can disrupt your vagina’s pH level (which is naturally acidic) and cause irritation and discomfort. The vagina is a self-cleaning part of the body that does a great job at keeping things regulated.
American Apparel Pubic Hair Mannequins Stop Pedestrians In Their Tracks (PHOTOS)
Alright, American Apparel, we get it: Youreally like pubic hair.
The always controversial retailer got people talking yet again, this time with store window mannequins adorned with pubic hair. Gothamist spotted the mannequins in New York City at the East Houston Street location of American Apparel, which has been stopping people in their tracks. (But did they then go into the store to buy the brand’s panties??)
The Huffington Post spoke to an associate at the store, who said that the mannequins went up at 3am on Thursday morning and were meant to convey the “rawness and realness of sexuality.” They’re aimed at drumming up sales around Valentine’s Day, and it would appear it’s already working: Curious pedestrians have been crowding around the store taking photos, and American Apparel has received a barrage of media inquiries.
American Apparel has a history of using pubic hair in its imagery, potentially for shock value (a trademark American Apparel strategy). Just last fall, the store sold a graphic T-shirt containing an image of a menstruating vagina with hair-down-there, which caused an online stir. Before that, American Apparel released a 2011 adfeaturing a model in sheer underwear with — you guessed it — visible pubic hair.
It’s clear Dov Charney, the founder and CEO of American Apparel, has no issue using jarring imagery related to female genitalia, either as a calculated move to court controversy or as an empowering statement on the female body (or both). Do these mannequins make you want to buy American Apparel clothes?
Drama, drama, drama…
Resources:
The Huffington Post | By Rebecca Adams & Megan MayerPosted: 01/16/2014 12:27 pm EST | Updated: 01/18/2014 7:57 am EST
“Hey Kim, I need ideas to spice up my sex life. We’re going away and I want to have lots of sex.” – “Married in NY “
Are you guys into toys?
“We’ve never used them before, but I’m willing to try anything. We’ve been having sex with each other for more than 10 years, and I don’t want him to get bored.”
There are a few answers to this, and I gladly bring you:
5 Steps to Keep Your Sex Life Exciting.
Are they all for you? Maybe, maybe not. The trick is, that trying each one can only make your love life better. Very seldom do they make it worse.
Find Out What Your Partner’s Into
1. Find Out What He/She is Into
Does she like her toes sucked? Has he hinted about exploration of the “taint”?
Great partnerships are all about meeting the needs and expectations of the other. Remember that it’s not only you that needs pleasing.
The best way to know for sure – is to ask. Starting up a dialogue is best done after sex, when you’re relaxed and comfortable.
Just make sure to catch your partner before he/she falls asleep!
Don’t Be Afraid to Try Something New
2. Don’t Be Afraid To Try Something New
Read about a new trick? Saw a technique you can try with your tongue? Gently surprise your partner with a new move every once in a while.
Be sure not to spring something completely out of the ordinary without consulting with your partner first. There’s nothing more blinding and confusing than a surprise vibrator where you least expect it.
Whether it be a new location or a position from Kama Sutra, new things add a level of excitement that can only be replaced with, well, something new.
Surprise Her Tonight
3. Turn Dysfunction Into a Dirty Word
There is a solution for nearly every problem in the bedroom. Erectile Dysfunction is not a death sentence for a man or his penis.
Consider products that are geared towards the specific concern.
Finishes early? Try masturbating first, then applying a Stay Hard Cream. It stimulates blood flow to the penis, creating a strong erection.
The pre-game masturbation typically creates a lag in ejaculation time.
Not into creams? Try a c-ring. Penis rings keep blood flow “locked” into the penis for harder, longer-lasting erections.
Include a vibrating ring and there’s pleasure for you and your partner.
Try getting into the mood by not having sex. Foreplay is the lubrication that gets the engine started (see what I did there?).
Kissing, embracing, caressing and fondling can all be done without actual penetration.
See how long you can perform these activities before the sensation becomes unbearable.
Then – have at it.
“According to a national sex study, with the exception of the 71+ age group, at least 60% of men have masturbated within the past year, and an impressive 84% of men between 25 and 29 are taking matters into their own hands. In contrast, women are masturbating in much smaller numbers, consistently 10% to 30% lower than men in the same age group. This is bad news for you because a woman who is well acquainted with her own body will be more confident sexually, making her willing and able to blow your mind in the bedroom. So, you should never discourage her from pleasuring herself.”
“The survey also revealed that masturbating in the presence of a partner is a less popular activity than going solo with only 49% of men aged 25 to 29 engaging in it. Encouraging your girl to touch herself while you watch is the best way to learn what does it for her, and letting her watch you will have the same effect for her.”
Add Toys To Your Playtime
5. Add Toys To Your Playtime
Toys, also known in the industry as “marriage aides,” can stimulate parts of the body that your partner has yet to discover.
Consider introducing a new toy each month with your partner. Whether you’ve tried toys before in the past or not, it will be a new
experience for the two of you.
G-Spot Stimulators are primarily used for the female “G-Spot”, but can be used in other areas such as the “taint” in men or the clitoris on women.
Toys are not substitutes for human stimulation, but can be the catalyst to pleasuring your partner.
Get To Know Your Partner’s Sexual Preferences
The bottom line is – you must be in tune with your partner to know what works and what doesn’t.
None of this advice is a cure for the good old conversation. Have a dialogue with your partner every once in a while to find out
his/her needs. It’s the best advice I could ever give.
Feel free to ask your Awkward Questions in the comment box below, or email me at VForVadge@gmail.com. All posts are completely confidential.
Despite America’s somewhat “liberal” approach to sex and public affection, other countries are not as receptive to acts that may be perceived as sexual. Take a look at some of the most outrageous ways to get yourself arrested – maybe even killed – in the sake of romance…
13 SEX ACTS THAT WILL GET YOU ARRESTED AROUND THE WORLD
You always thought your acrobatics between the sheets were so good they should be illegal — little did you know, they just might be. From keeping the lights on in Hungary to being a sex toy aficionado in Texas, you may find yourself behind bars for what you thought was just a harmless bit of fun. Check out what’s on the local books below before your next liaison becomes your last.
United Arab Emirates Carnal act that will get you screwed: In Dubai, any sort of PDA, even a peck on the cheek, results in 10 days of jail time for each person (but if you’ve been boozing you could face up to a year).
Uruguay Carnal act that will get you screwed: If you get caught in the sack with another man’s wife, it is totally within his rights to either kill the both of you, or to castrate you and chop off the wifey’s nose.
Estonia Carnal act that will get you screwed: In Estonia’s capital, sex requires your undivided attention; a quick game of chess while copulating is strictly forbidden.
Utah Carnal act that will get you screwed: Like most places, it’s illegal to marry your first cousin… before the age of 65 that is (or 55, if you can prove both parties are infertile). If that isn’t the case, the marriage will be declared void from the beginning.
Spain
Carnal act that will get you screwed: Better to drink a sex on the beach in Spain than have it; frolicking on the beach is illegal and can cost you up to €75,000 in fines, so keep it in your pants ’til you’re back in your room.
Texas
Carnal act that will get you screwed:You may own up to six dildos, no more. A drawer full of any more could get you a Class A Misdemeanor, resulting in a fine of up to $4,000 and/ or a jail term of up to one year.
London, UK Carnal act that will get you screwed:Sex on a parked motorcycle is a no-no (so don’t attempt to recreate the Bound 2 video). Also, never ask a strange woman for sex in a pub. Kimye impersonators will go straight to jail, while you can expect a fine equivalent to $250 and up to three months in the clink for unsolicited requests, no matter how smooth.
Sweden Carnal act that will get you screwed: Taking full-frontal pics in a photo booth is a cardinal sin in Sweden, though you’re welcome to go topless. Expect a heavy fine if the wrong cop catches you.
Hungary Carnal act that will get you screwed: Off with those lights, and keep ’em that way — in Budapest, sex is only allowed in the dark. Even in your home, with your wife.
Little Rock, Arkansas Carnal act that will get you screwed: No matter how suave you consider yourself, keep your pick-up lines to yourself, as “lascivious banter” in public is prohibited and may put you behind bars for 30 days.
Virginia Carnal act that will get you screwed: Don’t cheat, player — adultery is a Class 4 Misdemeanor, which could earn you a maximum fine of $250.
Louisiana Carnal act that will not get you screwed: Necrophilia is legal!! Knock yourself out… weirdo.
Sophie-Claire Hoeller is Thrillist’s über-efficient German travel writer. She’s had frequent flyer status ever since her mother gave birth to her at a Lufthansa terminal. Follow her adventures via Twitter at @Sohostyle.
Here’s a quick tutorial on the cleaning, care and storage process of sex toys. Everyone should have an effective routine when it comes to protecting their battery operated friends…
Would you ever use a dirty fork to eat with? Would you ever wear dirty underwear? Unless the situation was dire, probably not, right? Well, how about this one: Would you ever use a dirty sex toy?
Not properly cleaning and caring for you sex toys is similar to not using a clean fork to eat with or not wearing clean underwear. There are sanitation issues. There’s an increased likelihood for infection or illness. And simply put, it’s just gross.
Eating with clean utensils and wearing clean underwear are lessons we were taught as children. The proper care of sex toys … not so much. But it’s never too late to learn, right? So let’s dive right into the dos and don’ts of how to care for your adult toys:
Always wash them. It’s important to clean your sex toys both before and after you use them. Bacteria can live on your devices, and when used with lubrication, the material of the toy can get sticky, picking up unknown debris that you would never want to put on or inside your body.“Always wash your sex toys with a cleanser that’s made specifically for them,” instructs our exclusive book “The Passion Parties Guide to Great Sex.” Soap can be harsh on the different materials of your sex toys. Plus, specific toy cleaner, like Clean & Simple™ Adult Toy Cleanser, is safe on all toys, regardless of the material it’s made of. Additionally, “using anything other than a specially made cleanser can give you an infection or a rash,” our book confirms. Just make sure that before you clean your toys you unplug or remove all batteries, and after you clean them, your toys are completely dry prior to putting them away.
Don’t use silicone-based lube with silicone toys. Silicone-based lubricants will damage silicone toys and products made of cyber-skin or FutureFlesh™, so if you are using silicone toys, try a water-based lube like the RomantaTherapy Revelation™ Lubricant. Water and silicone-based lubes are safe for all other sex toys.
Never share your toys. These toys are probably the only ones you don’t ever have to share, and nor should you. Your toys are just for you. Even after cleaning them, they should not be shared, swapped, etc. In “The Passion Parties Guide to Great Sex,” we take this notion one step further in the next tip:
“Never use the same toy for anal and vaginal sex,” our book strongly advises. “In fact, don’t put anything in the anus and then expect to put it anywhere else. … No matter how carefully you wash that area, it contains bacteria that you don’t want to introduce into any other part of your body. … (And) putting a condom on a toy won’t do it. You should cleanse the toy before using it elsewhere, or, even better, reserve certain toys for anal use only and never use them in any other parts of your body.”
Store your toys with care. Taking the time to properly store your toys will help ensure the longest possible shelf life and that you are using clean, safe toys each time you pull one out. Best practices include waiting until your toys are completely dry before storing, removing batteries, storing each individually in a plastic baggie, and putting them away in a private place, away from prying eyes. We suggest locking your toys in our Pink Butterfly Toy Box or Deluxe Toy Box (which you can earn for hosting a Passion Party).
Featured products: The Passion Parties Guide to Great Sex (Item 6524 • $19.95 US/Item 6524C • $24.95 CDN), Clean & Simple Adult Toy Cleanser (Item 7019 • $15.50 US/Item 7019C • $18.50 CDN), RomantaTherapy® Revelation™ (Item 2207 • $12.50/Item 2207C • $16.50 CDN, and Pink Butterfly Toy Box (Item 7021 • $42.50 US/ Item 7021C • $49.50 CDN). To purchase any of these products, please contact your Passion Consultant.
With the world becoming more accepting of pornographic film and literature – it is no surprise that the average civilian thinks their sex life doesn’t chop up to that of porn. Unbeknownst to many, the artistry in porn is mostly fiction. This video is a quick pick-me-up if you’re feeling down about your sex life.
In the era of “casual sex” and “situationships,” it is sometimes hard to say the word monogamous without laughing. On a large scale, behind closed doors, many individuals are engaging in unprotected sex with partners that they are not in exclusive relationships with.
So mathematically, how many people did you really sleep with in 2013?
So, how many partners have you had?
All lectures aside, everyone is responsible for his/her sexual health and encounters. While unprotected sex may feel great, the potential consequences feel terrible. Those urban legends are real; burning sensations, crabs – AIDS each exist in one capacity or another. The fact that you may not have contracted STD’s (yet) does not change the fact that you can. An individual is more likely to contract popular diseases like chlamydia, syphilis and HPV if condoms are not worn. Couple that with a casual sex partner – the possibilities are endless.
There are alternatives to skipping protection these days, as thousands of condom companies exist for your pleasuring pleasure. There are a number of varieties to choose from – so take some time out of your busy day to pick a condom that’s right for you. If you need help, we’ve done a little research for you.
The scary part isn’t that you can contract these diseases – it’s that you may not even know where you got it from. Unless you get tested bi-annually and keep track of your partners, there will be no way to detect the culprit. He/she may not even know they have an STD – and may still be out spreading it to other “situations.” How long will that take to come back to you? Calculating the Sex Degrees of Separation, probably not very long.
