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The UMIE by Tantriss – VDay ’17 Gift Ideas

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The UMIE by Tantriss – VDay ’17 Gift Ideas

Valentine's

Shopping for Valentine’s Day gifts has been getting trickier and trickier by the year. I’m stuck thinking about what shirt or cologne or technology I haven’t bought my spouse. This week I thought to myself, “Self – how can we make Valentine’s Day more interesting?”

I know – sex stuff!!

Most of us have sex on a regular basis, whether it’s with ourselves or with a partner. This year, I’m making it my personal duty to seek out products and technology that can help make sex more interesting, more fun. I received UMIE from Tantriss and couldn’t wait to share it with you.

 

UMIE


About UMIE:

“Tantriss created UMIE as a way to bring the ancient practice of Tantra to the next generation, shaping the future of sexual communication through the use of smart technology. With their device, women and couples are able to embark on a journey of self-discovery and sexual enlightenment in a fun, nonthreatening way with the press of a button.”

 

 

UMIE also seamlessly interfaces with its accompanying app, allowing users to connect via WiFi to remotely control all its features.  Whether you are in the same bed, on other ends of the house or on opposite sides of the world, you can play with your partner and bring them an unequaled level of pleasure.   UMIE is incredible for solo use and is a great way to stay “connected” to any long-distance relationship.

 

 

I love the satin finish and ergonomic design – it’s a wonderful, luxe-quality vibrator that is delightfully cute, yet grown. Since I love eco- friendly toys, being rechargeable is a must for me.

Since I know some men and women are still apprehensive about toys, UMIE is the type of vibe I’d suggest when introducing pleasure products into couple couple’s play. The vibrations are gentle, yet strong – and it’s quiet enough to use discreetly. My kind of toy.

 


Got questions about UMIE? Let’s chat! Send them to kimi@vforvadge.com 

Down To DTR and How I Actually Did It

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Down To DTR? One Millennial’s Struggle to ‘Define The Relationship’.

At the risk of sounding problematic, I get serious anxiety thinking about defining the relationship; how soon is too soon?

How do I ask? Do I ask? Is it just implied…?

I don’t know about anyone else, and I definitely haven’t had that many experiences where having to define the relationship have been that difficult. In fact, my last boyfriend told my mom we were exclusive before I even knew we were exclusive. One could say I’m a bit of a late bloomer. I’m the person my family makes fun of for a seriously concerning addiction to made for TV RomComs and Lifetime specials, which has greatly influenced my highly unrealistic relationship expectations. It’s actually something that I have been working on (my expectations, not my Lifetime addiction), so when a friend brought up the DTR question as I was gushing to her about an older guy I had met a few months ago, I started to have a major internal breakdown.

Suddenly I’m thinking about whether or not I’m ready to DTR or ‘define the relationship’ with the guy I’ve been talking to every day for the past few months. The concept is definitely easier said than done, especially for someone like me who is riddled with anxiety when thrust into the simplest of situations. Suddenly, Childish Gambino lyrics flooded my mind;

“are we dating, are we fucking, are we best friends, are we something?”

 

I basically mustered just about every ounce of bravery I had in my body to send a simple “what are we?” text, but I couldn’t do it. I worried about timing and if it was even necessary on my part because things were going good. Although my friends were looking out for me by giving the motivation I needed to gain the balls to ask, I was becoming more and more nervous about it. It wasn’t the question that had me in the cold sweats; it was more stressful thinking about his response, or worse, the outcome. What if he and I wanted two separate things? What if he ghosts me, a new harsh and irritating reality for millennials. The questions racing through my mind were giving me a headache and stressing me out. I could think of every negative scenario possible and none were worth having the conversation. I thought if I didn’t bring it up, nothing could go wrong. In reality I wasn’t ready for an answer I didn’t like.

DTR


I’m not exactly sure why I didn’t feel comfortable just asking a simple question like, “where do you see this, us, going?” or even working it into normal conversation, considering we talk like friends. We’re alike in just enough ways that it makes talking fun, plus we’re still learning about each other, so it’s definitely interesting. We don’t take each other or ourselves too seriously; everything comes naturally and effortlessly for the two of us. When evaluating the status of my relationship (or let’s be real, the lack thereof), I thought about the strenuous lengths we go to just to communicate, a solid indicator to me that things with us are going good. He and I can’t go on real dates because we live on opposite ends of the East Coast, with me just miles away from Miami and him in the heart of New York. Not to mention we both have very busy schedules — he works and has a young daughter, and I’m a reserve flight attendant always on the move. This leaves us with phone calls, daily text messages, and FaceTime to fill the void. It’s fun because FaceTime isn’t the most flattering option in the world, but once I overcame my shyness and having to be done up all the time, I slowly started to come out of my shell more during our chats. Hell, he’s seen my real ugly cry via my front facing iPhone camera. It feels nice to be vulnerable and receive no judgement; we use FaceTime during real, honest moments of our day, and I appreciate it because it feels like we’re together doing our regularly scheduled activities.

After a while, and a lot of thought, I felt like the time was right to DTR because I genuinely care about this guy and I felt like the feeling was mutual. When you talk to someone every single day about everything and nothing at all, you learn things about them that spark your interest. It’s not even about the amount of dates you go on (we’ve only gone out on one real, face-to-face date). We simply can’t because of the way our lives are set up, but we still make the time for each other. It’s always important, especially with a new relationship that seems to have potential for longevity to go above and beyond for each other, particularly if distance is a dominating factor. He drove three and half hours, crossing state lines on Black Friday to see me while I was on a layover. He put forth the effort and it spoke volumes to me. I was happy with the idea of our long distance relations becoming a long distance relationship.

Finally, during one of our frequent FaceTime calls, I just decided to go for it confidently, albeit awkwardly, and ask, “what are we doing?” I thought it was straight to the point but after repeating the question with a confused look on his face, he totally understood what I meant. Of course, while it wasn’t the answer I had been hoping for; “are you interested in taking this to the next level?” I was more so relieved he didn’t view me as just a hook up or a friend with benefits. He said we were “exploring what we have right now”, which I took as us having the potential to be something more if we continued on the track we’re on. After a moment of disappointment on my end we talked about it, and I came to realize that I had put too much stress on trying to define the relationship.

 

DTR


Everyone is different and every new relationship has a different dynamic. If you want to DTR with the guy you’ve been hooking up with for the past two months, do it, but do it on your own terms and don’t feel pressured because of what other people are telling you. Go with your gut, but most importantly, go with the flow. Have fun exploring in your new relationship and getting to know one another. Worrying about defining the relationship strips the other person of your full attentions, and that isn’t fair for them. There’s no definite timeline on when you should DTR, as long as you have the confidence to. And hey, if you’re anything like me and easily stressed about little things like having the talk, there are ways around that too. When you’re having fun and really interested in the person, the labels should be the last thing on your mind. But, if it’s what’s most important to you, bring it up casually, and don’t be offended if it’s not exactly what you had in mind because chances are, if you’re both as into each other as you think you are, it’ll get there. Now, if he says something totally and utterly exasperating, like you’re just a fuck buddy when you thought it was the real deal, dump his ass and keep it moving. Ain’t nobody got time for that.

 

Got questions? Want to DTR and need advice? Email Abby@vforvadge.com and let’s chat! 

Treat Your Vulva Right With PrivateRX

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Treat Your Vulva Right With PrivateRX

For 2017, my ladies will be taking charge of their sexual health. It’s not even a question, that’s why I’m putting it into your atmosphere. Today, we’re talking about your vulva, and if you’ve experienced dryness there – this post is for you.


{Note: This post is sponsored by Private RX – but my opinions are still all mine, don’t worry!}


 

I’m sure you’re probably wondering, “why would I need to lube my vulva?”

Well, many of us don’t – but some of us do. Hormonal changes like childbirth, menopause (pre and early menopause included) and extreme stress can reduce the level of estrogen our bodies produce. In turn, this can cause the Bartholin’s glands (where lubrication is produced to the vaginal vestibule) to create less moisture. 

Vulva
Photo Credit

When this happens, life can become absolute torture. Sitting down at work can become uncomfortable, walking to the train – SEX. Many of the crucial parts of our daily lives can be negatively impacted by vulvar dryness. No one has time for that.

 

Read: Top 5 Things You Should Know About Your Vagina 

 

 

 

 


 

Vulva
Click Here and Get Yours

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

   What is Private RX External Vaginal Moisturizer?

The External Vaginal Moisturizer is a unique skin treatment to moisturize the external vaginal area and help alleviate dryness.

Intimate skin requires special moisturizing. Facial or body moisturizers can cause irritation and discomfort when applied to the delicate skin of the outer vaginal area. This unique external vaginal moisturizer formulation safely and effectively moisturizes the dry, flaky, mature skin.

  • Non-greasy and non-staining
  • No estrogen, no hormones, no parabens
  • Fragrance free

Additionally, It’s clinically proven, dermatologist tested and hypoallergenic.
Most of all, this is a great way to combat a problem that many women face and continue living your life to its full potential. Being a woman has its gifts and its difficulties, how awesome is it to find a solution to one of them?

 

I want to share this product with you because I love you so much. Sign up for my mailing list here and shoot me an email to kimi@vforvadge.com. Tell me in one line why you’re interested in the External Vaginal Moisturizer and it could be yours for free (I’m taking care of shipping, too)! I’ll be picking the winner at random on Friday (don’t worry, I won’t post who it is), and reaching out to you via email.

Got questions? Feel free to email me those as well! 

Get Anika Calhoun’s Lingerie Looks For Less

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Get Anika Calhoun’s Lingerie Looks For Less

Empire was pretty good last week, but all I could stare at was Anika Calhoun’s lingerie. Every piece was stunning and fit perfectly.

It’s a growing fashion trend on red carpets, but how can us regular women incorporate lingerie in our wardrobes? I’ve gathered a few pieces and suggestions that you can score for less.

Anika Calhoun
Credit: WornOnTv.com

I love a good piece from Agent Provocateur, but let’s be honest – I can’t afford this on the regular!

The Bra/Belt/Panty combo is the Raive Waspie in Black ($555.00), while the robe itself is the Deziree gown ($3395.00). No, I didn’t put the decimals in the wrong place.

The sexy belt (included) helps conceal areas many of us would rather do without, while the robe adds a bit of mystery to the almost nudity.

This sexy two-piece combo is sold together, saving you thousands at $12.55.

The garter belt is also included, increasing the sexy flare.

I also found a sexy robe that can be paired with it here.


Anika Calhoun

Anika Calhoun

I know La Perla when I see it, and Anika Calhoun definitely did her thing in this bra. The Maharani Carioca bra ($159.00) is a bit more practical for “daily” wear and appears to have more support for breasts.

Anika Calhoun
Maharani Carioca by La Perla

Of course, I couldn’t find an exact replica, but this unique underwire is a sexy substitute.

Grab a cute, lacey boyshort – and you have yourself a confidence boosting underwear combo.


I couldn’t round this post off without bringing in queen Cookie for more inspiration.

Cookie Lyon

Naturally, the merry widow corset that she’s wearing is limited edition from Victorias’s Secret, so don’t hold you breath on getting one.

I did, however, find this sexy number on the VS site for $46.99.

For women like me who don’t fit most bras in Victoria’s Secret, I found this beautiful sleepwear set for much less…

It comes in a number of colors, too – you know I’m getting them all!

So, do not despair, ladies – we can all get our sexy on without skipping next month’s rent.

Got questions? Send me an email – kimi@vforvadge.com, I can’t wait to chat with you!

Resources:

Agent Provocateur (Raive Waspie)

Agent Provocateur (Deziree)

Does Size Matter? Your Awkward Questions – Answered

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Does Size Matter? Your Awkward Questions – Answered

 

VForVadge was built on answering anonymous sex questions – and as long as you’re asking, we’ll keep answering…

Hi, I saw your channel and saw your videos and noticed how open minded you are so I hope you can answer. I believe you get many of these kind of questions but I hope you could answer mine. Does size matter? I’m 25-year-old guy and my penis is 9.5 inches long and 7 inches in girth/around so my penis is almost as thick as a coke can for example. Is it small, average or big in length and girth in your opinion? Do I have a good penis size in your opinion or is it too big or too small in length and/or girth? How much the thickness of a penis matters? Do you like a thick penis and how thick is thick in your opinion? Do I have a thick one? I’ve had problems with girls so that’s why I’m asking. Some girls have said it’s way too big but then said to their girlfriends it was small so I’m a bit confused. Also, does flaccid size matter? Do women like to see bigger flaccid dicks? My dick is about 6 – 6.5 inches when soft so is it big or small? I’m asking cause I have a massive bulge in my pants and I can’t hide it. Do girls like to see big bulges in a guy’s pants or not? What do u think? I hope u can answer 🙂

Hi There! Size is only relevant if it’s causing discomfort of some sort. At 9.5 inches long, you would be measuring far above average (5.5 – 6 inches). As long as you are pleasing your partner safely – I don’t think you have anything to worry about in that realm.

Human beings talk, and will often times adjust the words they use to suit whatever the purpose of their conversation is. I wouldn’t concern myself with that if I were you.

Flaccid size also is irrelevant, since you can’t actually have sex with a flaccid penis. Many men are growers (vs showers), so full potential isn’t seen until fully erect.

If you’re having difficulty concealing your penis in pants, you may want to consider tucking differently or changing the cut of your undies. I can’t speak for what other women want to see in pants, but if it’s making you uncomfortable you definitely want to address it.

 

Feel free to email me if you have other questions – kimi@vforvadge.com Have a great day!

 

Still wondering? Check out “Is My Penis Normal?” – our second most popular post! 

 


The Naughty List 2016

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The Naughty List 2016

It’s that time of year again! You’re racking your brain, trying to figure out what to get the people you love and adore. Well, if there’s one thing I know well – it’s how to give gifts and how to be naughty (that’s two things, oops!).

Might as well combine my favorite skills, right?

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For Men:

Most men like it simple, so it’s best to keep their gifts simple as well.

 

Naughty List
A pocket egg he won’t mind cracking open.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tenga Eggs are disposable masturbation sleeves that provide easy pleasure in a cool package and varying inner textures. They also come with a packet of lube, giving much more gifting value!

 

Naughty List

 

 

Vibrating Penis Rings are also known as Cock Rings, and can help prolong erection as well as add a vibrating treat to any lovemaking session. They’re pleasing to the eye, too – which makes them a great gift for couples.

 

The Naughty List

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Penis Pumps may seem like taboo gifts, but they’re worth so much more. Not only do they help provide short (and long) term growth benefits, but they can also help men with post-operation recovery (i.e. prostate cancer). This is a great gift for a partner to give when they’re looking to turn it up a notch in the bedroom.

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For Women:

Women may be a little more complex, but our goal today is to find gifts that just about anyone will love. Let’s try, shall we?

 

The Naughty List

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rabbit Vibrators gained huge popularity back in 1998 when one was featured on Sex and the City (“The Rabbit and the Hare episode“). Many women realized that vibrators aren’t evil and rushed sex stores nationwide to get their hands on one.

The dual stimulation of a rabbit vibe makes it a great gift for the lady in your life.

 

screaming-o-my-secret

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lipstick Vibes

We all love discretion, right? What better way to stash your vibrator than to make it look like something you’re expected to have? Lipstick vibrators are improving year by year, and are sure to give you a little giggle during travel times.

 

Couple’s Gifts:

Sexual fun isn’t all for single people, and what better reason than Christmas is there to gift your partner something you’ve always wanted to try?

 

The Naughty List

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

We-Vibe 4 Plus

This couple’s massager revolutionized the bedroom for many relationships. Not only can each partner enjoy it on their own – they can control it wirelessly while the other vibes out.

If you’re looking to splurge on a pleasure product – this is it.

 

The Naughty List

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Fifty Shade of Grey Keep Still Over the Bed Cross Restraint

Listen.  I am a control freak. It’s very hard for me to give that up to anyone. However – sex giveth and sex giveth away. Having a trusting partner is everything, and when you find that – giving over control becomes more exciting than you can bare.

Ok, enough about me!

Trying out restraints is a fun way to level up your sex life, and doing it safely helps you feel more secure. This kit is branded by 50 Shades of Grey and is just as sexy as the book.

 

Hopefully, these gifts encourage you to try something new under the mistletoe. Each one can be gift wrapped by request, too!

Got questions? Email me – kimi@vforvadge.com, I’ll be glad to help!




How to Self-Care During Stressful Times

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How to Self-Care During Stressful Times

Some of us are going through it  – for whatever reason “it” may be. Right now is the perfect time for a little self-care. The phrase feels overused, but many  of us aren’t doing it at all. Here are my favorite things to do when I feel anxiety sneaking up…

 

Self-care

Take a Selfie.

It seems like such a selfish thing to do, and that’s exactly what self-care is about. Taking a photo of yourself captures the emotions you’re feeling and allows you to express them without words.

 

 

 

 

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Self-Care

Eat Some Comfort Food.

The key to this tip is moderation. Indulge in one quality food or dessert break. I suggest a good slice of cheesecake, or a nice, warm bowl of homemade mac + cheese. Take it slow, savor the flavors and eat until you near satisfaction.

 

 

 

 

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Self-care

Stretch.

Stretching helps ease muscle tension as well as releases endorphins that help you feel good. This article from Everyday Health gives great suggestions on exercises to help battle depression and anxiety.

 

 

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Self-care

Talk to a Friend.

Take some time to vent to a friend, get your feelings out. A listening ear can be very therapeutic, as can offering positive energy to someone else.

 

 

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Self-care

Talk to No One. 

Conversely, spending time alone can be a great way to reset and relax after being bombarded with stress. Spend some time alone at least once per day to give yourself a chance to collect your thoughts.

 

 

[divider]

Self-Care

Seek Help

If you feel exceptionally overwhelmed, it is completely okay to speak with a licensed professional. Therapists work to help find the root cause of your anxiety and stress, or just offer an unbiased ear to help you cope.

Search for a therapist here (via the American Psychology Association)

 

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No matter what you opt for, be sure to take care of yourself. We only have one body and one mind, both of which take care of each other. If you have any questions or need help getting in the right direction – email me – kimi@vforvadge.com. Let’s get through this together.

IUD and ME – by Ayana Ellis

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IUD and ME

By Ayana Ellis

Nov 2, 2016 by

*Originally posted on byayanaellis.com*

 

You and your girls are sitting around having a conversation about birth control, condoms, dick, men, relationships, your body, what it rejects, what it accepts, what you not gon’ do and what you’re allergic to. But at least one of you are considering getting an IUD.

It’s you isn’t’ it.

 

Once you mention the dreaded Intruterine Device, your friends will tell you the horror stories of what they heard, and what the side effects are, even if they never in life had an IUD.

Girl, don’t get no damn IUD you will get a PID and then won’t be able to have a K.I.D.

Girl, you crazy, my friends’ sister had an IUD and went into toxic shock and died.

Girl, what? You don’t need to have no strange device in you just sitting there not knowing what the fuck.

Girl, an IUD? You buggin, you can get an infection!

Girl, my sister’s boyfriends wife got an IUD and they had to take it out and when they did? Her guts was wrapped around it!

So now you’re sitting there, even after all of your research, even after consulting with a physician, even after making your mind up, you are now confused as to what to do.   I say, get that damn IUD! And here’s why, it’s really, really simple.

 

First things first, more often than not, a woman that gets an IUD feels as if this is her freedom papers to stop giving a fuck about all things pussy.  Her mentality is that, she is in a monogamous relationship and her only concern is not getting pregnant and not having a period, which the IUD provides protection from.  Because of this, the female won’t go to the doctor.  She feels as if she is protected by the IUD and she is not.

Yes you are right, you have a strange device in you which means you need to go to the doctor more often than not!  No you’re not pregnant, and sure you don’t get a period, but don’t you want to check up on that strange device that’s in you?

 

 

So the issue is this, a woman tends to neglect her body once she gets an IUD inserted and this is where problems arise!  Because you are not checking up on your self semi-annually or annually you leave room for so many things to go wrong, then you blame the IUD!

Granted the IUD is valid for 3-5 years, but that that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t visit your physician until it’s time to take the IUD out!  This doesn’t mean ignore stomach pains and self diagnose by using WebMD! This doesn’t mean ignoring the spotting that may occur or the strange smells coming from your vagina and douching it out instead of going to the doctor.  These are all signs that something inside of you is wrong, don’t ignore it and then blame it on the IUD!

Once an intrauterine device is inserted, your body will change.  Things will start happening that normally doesn’t.  Find out the side effects of IUD’s, do your homework and keep yourself informed!  It is on you to stay on top of those changes, document everything and follow up with your doctor in the event that anything seems off!

Sometimes  it is the device.  Sometimes it isn’t.  It’s on you to get into yourself and know your body so that you can determine your next step!

Like a woman that leaves a tampon in her for too long, that shit is just foul and ain’t nothing but self-neglect.  The tampon isn’t the issue, you are!

Worse case scenario, if the IUD isn’t for you, then it just isn’t.  But each person is designed different.  Take a chance and regardless of having an IUD or not, you should visit your Gynecologist as instructed to stay on top of your womanisms.

 

About Ayana Ellis:

http://byayanaellis.com/booksbyayanaellis/about-ayana-ellis/

MaskIt – The Tiny Accessory You Never Knew You Needed.

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MaskIt – The Tiny Accessory You Never Knew You Needed.

MaskIT Logo

 

Most of us women share one common detail – we get our periods. Is this the best time of our lives? I’ll safely say no. Probably one of the worst monthly events a human being could ever describe. We’ve gotta change pads, tampons, cups, sponges – all of which require disposal or storage. It’s gross, honestly.

 

What if there were an easier way to dispose of our sanitary products? Or store the reusable ones until we get home?

 

Now, before I get started – I am not being paid for this post. I just really, really like sharing good products with you all.

 

MaskIt

 

So – how does MaskIt work? It basically provides a “plastic” forcefield around your used sanitary product. Blood and bodily fluids do expire after time and have a strong odor. This is a great way to keep your hands clean and save all that rolled up tissue paper from the trash.

To make matters even better – it’s biodegradable!! Perfect for the woman on the move who still cares about the environment. I found it to be so awesome, I’ve shared my samples with friends and co-workers in my office.

 

MaskIt

 

So, what do you think about MaskIt? Would a product like this be useful to you? 

Get your own MaskIt kit here! 

The Gift They Can’t Help But Grab…

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The Gift They Can’t Help But Grab – Pussy.

 

Everyone likes getting surprise mail, right? Imagine how much your friends (or ex friends) would love a special, unexpected package that tells them how you truly feel.

Pussy

  Now you can send a special message to anyone you’d like (or dislike). Opening a bag of pussy can either be a sweet compliment or the ultimate insult. We won’t offer any specific suggestions…

Pussy

Each Bag of Pussy includes a reusable sack and top- quality, delicious pussycats. We’ll include a personalized note at your request, with or without your name.

Pussy Mail

Give the gift of Pussy here

Want to make your gift even more “thoughtful?” Send it with glitter on top.

Oh, they’ll love that.