"You're Gonna Put That Where?? There!!" A Crash Course in Anal by Bunz Bee - V for Vadge


Sex Education for the Real World…


“You’re Gonna Put That Where?? There!!” A Crash Course in Anal by Bunz Bee

Posted October 12, 2012 by Kimani in Love. Life. Erotica.

Are there limits to sexual activities? Or should I say, are there limits to your sexual activities? How far will you go to please your mate? Is it really about pleasing him? Or do certain sexual acts peek your interests just a teensy bit? Is curiosity enough to kick your cat to the curb for the night? Are you willing to try some things once?

Okay – three times?


Sure, you’ve done oral, you let him cum in your face, nut in your mouth, you’ve swallowed, brought toys to the room. But for all you hardcore fuckers, have you ever taken it in the buns? I mean, getting your backdoor kicked in, when the crack that’s attacked is the one in back, having sex in the butt.  The ultimate form of birth control – next to swallowing.  We’ve all tried it once, right? Ten times? Hey, I’m not judging. This topic is not intended for the tight asses, (pun intended), so feel free to sit at the kiddie table anytime during this conversation.

The proper description for anal sex is when the penis is inserted into the anus of the person you are having sex with. In heterosexual relationships, for us women, we reach our orgasm through the stimulation of your clitoris or your g-spot. Some men enjoy inserting their penises in a woman’s anus because the anal sphincter is usually tighter than the vagina. The sphincter is also very sensitive and has many nerve endings, being the source of pleasure….or pain. For some people it is considered painful, because your mental apprehension of the act itself will make things very tense.

70-80% of women achieve orgasm through vaginal intercourse.  For the other 20-30% who can achieve the “Big O” through both anal and vaginal…good for us! I mean, you! Good for you!


Okay, now what you really want to know about your first time. DO NOT attempt to try this if you feel under pressure. If you are not ready you just are NOT ready. Make sure you are very comfortable and uninhibited with your partner, because such an experience can lead to an awkward situation, not easy to forget. And please, PLEASE, relax ALL of your muscles!!!!! Pain is mental, if you think it’s going to hurt, then it will. The hardest part is getting the head in, once it’s at the opening of your anus, I suggest you take a deep breath and in one swift motion “throw that ass back”. No you didn’t just go blind, breathe. There are other factors that you need to take into consideration as well. The position you are in when the penis is inserted, how much lube and what kind, and for a lot of us, how many drinks you may or may not have had. Whatever you need to do to make you relaxed, and comfortable.


Those of us, I mean, those of you, that have tried this with success, tend to enjoy it laying on your side or back shots.  Whereas a percentage of us….you, find it easier to get on top.  It is my belief that in an upright position, you allow full access for a penis to comfortably guide its way through the anal passage.  It hurts less, if at all….makes sense? Do you use the bathroom lying down? Ok. You can also have full control of the penis, and you can take it all in at your own pace, that way as well.

Photo Credit

The most important detail that we cannot forget is the lube.  I know you all figure, lube? Astroglide, that is so “Lifestyle condoms” circa 1990. If you want this experience to be a smooth one, I suggest you try a lube that maintains the moisture factor throughout the whole experience. Here are some lubes you need to keep in the panty or boxer/brief drawer after you discard the baby oil and the Astroglide.

1.      Durex Play – very silky but slightly sticky. It comes in flavors such as Passion Fruit, Pina Colada and Very Cherry for you salad tossers.  It does dry out as quickly and will essentially leave you with a well tapped, and fruity booty.

2.      H2O – A latex safe lube that is not sticky, long lasting and silky.  It washes off easily and can also be licked off as well because it now comes in various flavors like, banana, chocolate, cherry, pineapple, peach, raspberry sorbet, pomegranate, strawberry, tangerine, watermelon and tropical passion.

3.      Swiss Navy Lubrication – Personally, I think this is the all-time best lubricant for your anal adventure. It is water based and slippery, as hell. Velvety smooth and condom safe. It never dries and eliminates any initial discomfort of anal penetration.  You don’t need to reapply this because it lasts right through to your orgasm(s).  Smooth enough for your partner to temporarily “coochify” your anus.

Which brings me to this.  The orgasm you will receive, in some opinions, is better than vaginal.  I’m trying not to seem too excited about expressing this to you, but the pleasure, you get, from a PROPER anal thrashing is absolutely MIND-BLOWING! Pure ecstasy. Do I sound excited? Well I am at the thought.  There are plenty nerve endings back there that will give you a sensation you may never receive vaginally. I’m not saying you must try it, but do it if you dare and if you are mentally prepared (or inebriated enough to try anything). It won’t change the person you have always been, but it may just introduce you to something new and extra in the bedroom and well needed in your sex life.


Look, if you can toss a salad, and swallow sperm, you can get fucked in the ass guilt free.


Happy Humping!



About the Author


A NY transplant in Florida, Kimani has taken on the task of educating the world on sexual health and education. The Mount Vernon native has seen AIDS and HIV spread through her community like wildfire, and hopes to cease the transmission of these and other diseases one person at a time. If you know better, you're inclined to do better.

LIKING us on Facebook helps our Vadge GROW!
Click like on Facebook to get VforVadge news straight to your timeline!
%d bloggers like this: